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Off Topic Historical Facts

Discussion in 'Newcastle United' started by Heed, May 24, 2017.

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  1. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Boring c@nt, why not f@ck off to the Mackem board with your illustrious, cock polishing mentor. I'm sure they'll love the two of you over there.....<laugh>
     
    #21
    jimileysbaldhead, May 25, 2017
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  2. Nolberto's Salsa Inferno

    Nolberto's Salsa Inferno Well-Known Member

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    Dear Uncle Heedor

    At Ye olde Rokere Parke on Saturday the 15th of Saint Witherspoons 1495 ...what was the attendance? (to the nearest million)
     
    #22
    Nolberto's Salsa Inferno, May 25, 2017
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  3. Judge Death

    Judge Death Well-Known Member

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    <laugh><laugh><laugh>
     
    #23
    Judge Death, May 25, 2017
  4. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Dear Nobby,

    A very good question.
    I can confirm that the attendance was 33.3m give or take one or two strays that refused yo pay.
    Common buggers, got their just deserts and we're hung, drawn and quartered.
    Rumour has it that 99.9% left at talk time.
     
    #24
    Heed, May 25, 2017
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  5. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Dear Jim,

    Another good question.
    Why not **** off to the Mackem board with my mentor?

    Unfortunately, my mentor is still on a round the world expedition and isn't due back yet.
    Secondly, my many fans on this board have implored me to stay for the summer.<ok>
    I sense it may be a long summer.<laugh>
     
    #25
    Heed, May 25, 2017
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  6. Dorty Dogbreath

    Dorty Dogbreath keeper of the glow

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    Dear Uncle Fredor... sorry Heedor

    In days of olde, were darling teenage daughters always so gobby and bitchy? <grr>

    Yours,
    Stressed Daddy
     
    #26
    Last edited: May 25, 2017
    Dorty Dogbreath, May 25, 2017
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  7. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    Dear Old Unc

    What was the best thing before sliced bread?

    Yours Curiously

    I am Groot
     
    #27
    Delusional Full Stop, May 25, 2017
    Heed likes this.
  8. Judge Death

    Judge Death Well-Known Member

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    Bread
     
    #28
    Judge Death, May 25, 2017
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  9. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Just a guess mind, but I think it was unsliced bread....
    Best thing since sliced bread is obviously Nev's Prediction Game.
     
    #29
    Heed, May 25, 2017
  10. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Dear Dorts,

    As long as I can remember, and that's a very long time, teenage daughters have always been gobby and bitchy.

    May, I suggest that you consider wumming mackems as a means of de- stressing yourself. My mentor has found it helped him in recent weeks.
     
    #30
    Heed, May 25, 2017
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  11. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Dear David,

    Chicken or the egg first?
    Personally I don't like eggs, so it will be chicken for myself.
    I think you need to ask yourself, with five chickens on your plate, is there room for the egg. <ok>
     
    #31
    Last edited: May 25, 2017
    Heed, May 25, 2017
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  12. jimileysbaldhead

    jimileysbaldhead Well-Known Member

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    Well isn't that f@cking dandy....<laugh>
    Keep up the good work...<ok>
     
    #32
    jimileysbaldhead, May 25, 2017
  13. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    Dear Heedor,

    When you were at the wedding at Cana, did Jesus really turn water into wine?

    Yours

    DME
     
    #33
    Obi Wan, May 25, 2017
  14. Heed

    Heed well known cheat

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    Hmm, religion isn't one of my strong points, so I think I better sleep on this one tonight.
     
    #34
    Heed, May 25, 2017
  15. JakartaToon

    JakartaToon Well-Known Member
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    Dear Heedor
    Can you confirm why your beloved mentor was deported to Australia on the convict ships. I have heard various rumours - I don't know which one was true:
    1) lying about attendances at Ye Olde Rokere Parke
    2) stealing a loaf of bread (unsliced)
    3) caught abusing young boys in the Fulwell End
    4) caught cheating on Nev's Great Grandad's prediction league competition 1894-5 season (final results to be posted soon)

    Thank you in advance
     
    #35
    JakartaToon, May 26, 2017
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  16. Obi Wan

    Obi Wan keeper of the peace

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    Hmm, trying the old multi - choice trick question, knowing full well they are ALL correct, eh?
     
    #36
    Obi Wan, May 26, 2017
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  17. Hung Drawn and Quartered

    Hung Drawn and Quartered Well-Known Member

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    I see how you tried to get that accusation through the back door

    :emoticon-0181-fubar :emoticon-0172-mooni I was never one of them in the Fulwell End :emoticon-0172-mooni :emoticon-0173-middl
     
    #37
    Hung Drawn and Quartered, May 26, 2017
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  18. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    <laugh>
     
    #38
    Delusional Full Stop, May 26, 2017
  19. Albert's Chip Shop

    Albert's Chip Shop Top Grafter
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    Heedor,
    Why is there no white dog **** anymore?
    ACS
     
    #39
    Albert's Chip Shop, May 26, 2017
  20. Delusional Full Stop

    Delusional Full Stop Here to serve all your counselling needs.
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    upload_2017-5-26_11-8-9.jpeg
     
    #40
    Delusional Full Stop, May 26, 2017
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