Getting battered aff a bird

Here, I think my latest obsessive kink is bordering on Tory MP patter.

There are certain birds in the world that I want to batter me more than I want them to ride me.

Have any of you ever let a bird kick your **** in? Is it as thrilling as I've recently started imagining it to be?

They don't have to be muscular birds - just a bit bossy but a square shouldered lassie wae a decent hook gies me an instant semi.

Anyway, Sharapova, the ginger consultant off Holby and DJ Spinderella are all women I've recently thought heavily about setting aboot me.

Should I seek help or should I just throw a Romanian in Pollokshaws £50 and tell her to keep the marks on my moneymaker to a minimum?

 

Just get a hooker to do it, that is probably easier(and cheaper) than getting Sharapova to do it

 

Bit wary that some big people trafficker will appear and just wade in as well.

That doesn't sound very sexy at all.

 

Meet the hooker in your gaff or hotel

 

Just go to a Zumba class and get your cock out mid session.

 

I do that all the time. Tho, I'm usually outside the window looking in.

 

Or a feminism rally

 

One of the lads at sevens whipped out a video of this guy getting his (massive) balls punched and stamped on by a lassie in big heels - that's a bit far for me.

I just want a wee dusting up.

Just show me who's boss and that.

 

I would like to take on 5 or 6 dwarves over 10 3 minute rounds barefoot in lycra pants cage fighting style.
Men women I don't mind it would just be nice to toe punt one in the face .
Failing that Dev and GroveRanger.

 

The GC Whatsapp group has a vid of two midget bitches headering a guy in the balls.

 

Lol

 

I did watch that.

 

The black woman dragging that boy about like a ragdoll was my favourite.
Brought me off a treat.

 

Ah know

He got bitch slapped all over the street