Off Topic Northern Bloke Reports Queen To The Old Bill

Because his missus locks him out until she's finished with her boyfriend.

 

Surely, that would indicate just how chaotic my life is?

Also, they are hardly rants. Unless I can be taken to "ranting" about being knee-deep in unremitting hot totty?

 

Thanks for making me smile, Skids!

The reality is, of course, that the only thing you get to play with is your wife's cock.

 

Or it could indicate how sad your life is that you're reduced to posting pictures of fish on a footballl forum at 3am. It's not exactly rock and roll is it?

 

But in reality the only person here who plays cock is you and your missus but not yours.

 

No it indicates your cuckholded and have to wait in the car.

 

You really don't need to theorise, Afro Stan; I've already given you the correct answer.

@PISKIE I'm claiming 3 points for this owning. Please make sure you add it to your tally-of-woe.

 

I'm sure Mrs HIAG is relieved when you stay up all night searching for images of fish to post on a football forum

 

She doesn't mind. She's too busy getting humped by her boyfriend.

 

I left her absolutely gaped mate, sorry about that.

 

She says Hi by the way. Oh and can you pick up a pint of milk on your way back from Maccy D's.
She also said she might be late back tonight, so she doesn't mind if you wait up until 3am posting pictures of fish